Uncle Paul & Aunt Florence

Uncle Paul was my grandmother’s brother on my mother’s side of the family. 

Uncle Paul and Aunt Florence fussed and fought their entire   married life, and they were married for over fifty years.  They couldn’t live with each other and they could not live without each other.  When my mother, grandmother, and aunt Doe, moved to Menard from Water Valley, they lived across the street from Uncle Paul and Aunt Florence.  So,  they were witnesses to every argument Paul and Florence had, which was almost a daily event. 

So, Uncle Paul and Aunt Florence were having a big fuss one day.  Now, Paul was forever threatening to kill himself.  He had a gun in his hand and he told Florence he was going to go up on the hill and kill himself.  Florence kept trying to tell him something, and Paul thought she was trying to stop him from killing himself.  He told her, “Florence Keele, don’t try to talk me out of killing myself.  I’m really going to do it this time.”  She said, “Paul, I’m not trying to talk you out killing yourself, I’m trying to tell that you forgot the bullets.”  Needless to say Uncle Paul never killed himself, and he lived to be ninety six years old when he died. 

While Uncle Paul and Florence were in the same house, their house caught on fire one night.  Mother said, instead of Paul trying to put the fire out, he was busy trying to hide the fact that he had wired around the electrical meter so he wouldn’t have to pay for the electricity he was using.  I don’t know whether they found out what he had been doing, but the house burned to the ground.  This could probably be attributed to the fact that Uncle Paul had wired around all the safety equipment meant to keep your house from burning to ground.

Uncle Paul was a binge drinker and, he once got drunk and rode his horse down the main street in Menard thumbing his nose at every one he met.  Unfortunately, one of them was the county sheriff.  He promptly arrested Paul and took him to jail. 

The last story I want to tell about Uncle Paul and Aunt Florence, is about the time Paul ran for sheriff of Menard County.  Uncle Paul was drinking in a bar one day, and guys in there started telling Uncle Paul how popular he was and that he should run for sheriff.  Now Paul did not realize they were making fun of him.  So, he ran for sheriff.  He got two votes, and Aunt Florence said, “I wonder who those two people were that voted for you, because I know I sure did not vote for you.” 

Although, I was not close to Uncle Paul and Aunt Florence, they are still a part of my child hood memories.